When Our Kids Hold Up the Mirror

I wanted to share a humbling parenting moment I had recently — one that reminded me how deeply our children are paying attention, and how powerful our example really is.

We were heading out as a family, and I hopped into the back seat, distracted and juggling bags and snacks. A few minutes into the drive, my 13 year old turned to me and said, “Mom, you always tell me to put on my seat belt — but you didn’t put yours on. You’re not following what you tell us.”

Oof. That one landed hard.

My first impulse was to defend myself — “I was just about to!” or “We’re not even on the main road yet.” But I paused and realized: he was right. It was a small thing, but it reflected something bigger. 

Our kids are always watching, and they’re often much quicker than we are to notice inconsistencies between our words and actions. And sometimes, they’ll call us out — not to be rude, but because they’re learning to take our words seriously.

I took a deep breath and said, “You’re absolutely right. Thank you for reminding me — that wasn’t okay.” Then I buckled up. It’s not always easy to admit when we mess up, but it’s also a great chance to show them that grown-ups are still learning too.

What struck me most was how calmly and clearly he called me out — not to be disrespectful, but because he believed what I taught him, and expected me to live by it too. That’s powerful. And it’s a good reminder that accountability goes both ways in a family.

So this week, I’m leaning into the lesson: that parenting isn’t about being perfect, but about being honest, humble, and open to growth — even when it comes from the back seat.

If you're ready to take your parenting to the next level, or feel stuck in your parenting journey, message me directly or a book a free Parenting Roadmap call.

Best,
Dr. Sarita