When Every Child Needs You Differently—At the Same Time

As a parent coach, I often talk with families about the importance of connecting with each child in a way that truly resonates with who they are.

But I’ll be honest—with three kids of my own, all in different developmental stages, even I have days where this feels like an impossible juggling act.

My oldest is growing more independent—and I find myself walking a fine line between giving him space and trying to stay connected. Middle one thrives on connection and physical closeness- always talking, hugging, needing my full emotional presence and time together. And my youngest? He is full of energy, and constant curiosity.

Each one of them needs me—but not the same version of me. And that’s the part that can feel overwhelming.

Some days, I feel like I’m doing okay.

Other days, I go to bed wondering:

Did they each feel loved in the way they needed?

Was I too patient with one and too reactive with another?

Did I miss the chance to connect in a moment that mattered?

And the truth is: I probably did.

I probably do miss those moments sometimes. I am just one person trying to meet three completely different sets of needs.

But here’s the shift I come back to, over and over:

It’s not about getting it perfect, it’s about showing up with intention.

• Connection doesn’t have to be equal—it needs to be personal.

• Rupture and repair are part of the journey.

• Presence is powerful—even in small doses.

• You don’t have to “fix” everything.

Yes, the struggle is real—but so is the growth, for them and for us.

If you're navigating different needs with multiple kids, please know you're not failing—You’re Parenting. Imperfectly. Thoughtfully. With heart.

I see you. I’m right there with you. And you’re doing better than you think.

If you're ready to take your parenting to the next level, or feel stuck in your parenting journey, message me directly or a book a free Parenting Roadmap call.

Best,
Dr. Sarita